Comments on: Pass the remote, can we just fast forward

By: Joy

Joy — Sat, 14 Nov 2009 03:45:29 +0000

It’s been over a year since you wrote this series on grief and lost your baby… and it’s been over a year since I buried my oldest daughter. Though the circumstances are different, I’ve been/am still facing a lot of this. I ask the same questions. I wrestle with God about giving and then taking away — it seems so cruel. But then I remember Jesus and what he took for me. It doesn’t take the pain away, but it sort of helps to remember that Jesus suffered too and understands.

Thank you for sharing so candidly.

By: one_eyed girl

one_eyed girl — Mon, 25 Aug 2008 23:18:47 +0000

I am so sorry for your loss. I have never miscarried but my Mom did before she had me. She was 6 wks. She said it was very painful. She says it was a girl and she still talks about she will see her in Heaven one day. She would be 36 yrs. old. Call Mom if you ever need to talk.

By: Patti

Patti — Fri, 15 Aug 2008 05:05:35 +0000

I’m so sorry for your loss. I had a still birth followed by 3 miscarriages, and that was after my first 3 kids, and while I was happy with my children, it didn’t diminish my losses. They were still my babies, and I wanted them dearly. I did name them all, and I think it did help with the grieving process.

This is not an easy thing to go through, and if you end up feeling alone or like no one understands or like you need someone who’s been there to talk to, then I’m available….even though you don’t know me.

Someone said to me once that the Father gives comfort and helps to take away the pain…it’s a different outlook on the whole giving and taking away thing.

I’ll be praying for you for peace and comfort and for rest and strength and for the ability to hear His love song sung over you in the middle of this storm.

By: Grateful for Grace

Grateful for Grace — Fri, 15 Aug 2008 03:06:13 +0000

I soooo can relate to the emotions you describe. Do you know the song, “Praise You in the Storm” by Casting Crowns?
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uHdcyue0bSw
I’ve had an incredibly difficult 2.5 years. Big things happening. It just wouldn’t stop. Like Job. Just sorta. Anyway, that song speaks to my heart and so do all of Job’s questions.
I’m so grateful we serve a God who’s shoulders are big enough for both our tears and our fists. Who’s love is big enough for our trust and our doubt.
Praying for you.
Truly.

Grateful for Graces last blog post..Our Prayers Were Answered

By: Anne Mabry

Anne Mabry — Fri, 15 Aug 2008 00:23:43 +0000

Can't remember Amy's older brother either! but then again, I'm older than you so I've lost more memory capacity. BTW, how is Tyson? Where is Tyson? Haven't thought of him in years! what a cutie. Anne Mabrys last blog post..I need your help to kick off my birthday

By: Elisa

Elisa — Fri, 15 Aug 2008 00:17:15 +0000

I agree with pp that naming the baby can help. It's meant a lot to me to follow along with you in this painful last few weeks. I wish I could know you and give you a hug and some more personal words of comfort. I named my little girl. I'm sure it was a girl. I also planted a memory garden. Taking out some of my pain and frustration on the hard dirt and weeds was cathartic and watching the new life emerging in a dark corner of our yard was healing. As we dug the soil and planted the seedlings, I was able to find a way to explain to my young daughter what had happened to the baby sister she was so excited about. I told her that just like some of the seeds we planted might not grow all the way to mature plants, sometimes little baby "seeds" didn't grow right and went home to heaven to be with God, instead of coming to live with us. Praying for you.... Elisas last blog post..The "more, later"

By: Karen (Pediascribe)

Karen (Pediascribe) — Thu, 14 Aug 2008 16:49:24 +0000

Beautifully put.
I’ve always wondered about “God gives us the desires of our heart.”
I’m thinking now it means more that just getting what we think we want. I think it means God puts those desires into our heart. For a reason. And sometimes we don’t know that reason right away. And sometimes we never will.
We muddle through this fallen world and try to stay focused on Him. But sometimes the daily pains take over.
(((hugs)))

Karen (Pediascribe)s last blog post..SOMETHING JUST ISN’T RIGHT

By: MK

MK — Thu, 14 Aug 2008 16:47:44 +0000

I still can't pretend to know what you're going through. You're so much stronger than I would be. I'm still praying for you. That's all I know to do. I like the idea of naming your baby, and if you follow your pattern, a girl comes next. MKs last blog post..It's been a long time...

By: Amanda

Amanda — Thu, 14 Aug 2008 15:44:43 +0000

Amazing post. Really, truly amazing. I agree with Triple M and do suggest naming your baby. You can't know with certainty what the sex was, but you can see where your heart lies on the matter and go with that, or pick a gender neutral name. It does help in the grieving process, and helps for later reference (instead of just saying "the baby that we lost" all the time). Amandas last blog post..On Marriage, Holiness, and the Adoption Option

By: Triple M

Triple M — Thu, 14 Aug 2008 15:40:16 +0000

PS-some of my friends that lost their babies gave them a name. They memorialized them in that way. When they refer to their baby, it’s a person, not just a thing.